Mothers in Alabama are choosing to castrate their newborn male babies instead of having them circumcised. The move is in response to a recent bill passed in Alabama that makes it a felony to fuck someone who’s sperm however unintentionally reaches their uterus fertilizing their undesired egg that later requires removal by a licensed medical practitioner.
The bill would send medical providers and/or women and/or their family members to prison for 99 years if they have any procedure that Alabama Governor Kay Ivey does not approve of. Presidential candidate Joe Biden said that Governor Ivey was being irrational because quote, “Nobody has ever thought about fucking Governor Ivey! She is hardly in a position to pass judgment on women that men actually do want to fuck. If I am elected President, I will ensure that unfuckable women have nothing to do with the reproductive rights of fuckable women.”
Meanwhile Alabama women are dealing with the consequences of this new law now. One Alabama mother of a newborn male said, “I don’t want my son unintentionally impregnating someone and then have to watch as she gets carted off to the slammer after he does the right thing by paying for his half of the abortion. That is why I chose castration over circumcision.” Although, some medical professionals are arguing for both.
Another mother seemed to be thinking more punitively. She said, “I’m going to castrate my son and I’m never fucking my husband again”. She added, “With this new law it just doesn’t make sense for women to be having sex with men. It’s not like we enjoy it anyway.” Her 26-year-old son has hired an attorney.
Seemingly every other woman we spoke with in Alabama felt the same way. 100% of the Alabama women we polled (no pun intended) said that they planned on practicing abstinence, at least when it came to having sex with men. However, 72% did say they intended to keep using their vibrators while 63% said they planned on trying out sex with other women.
Mary Lou Jenkins of Mobile said it best, “I use to fuck my husband twice a week, but now it’s just too risky. I mean I never orgasm, and he does every time. I don’t want to have kids, so what’s the point? I might as well fuck a cucumber.”
Even the one woman in Alabama that does enjoy having sex with men said that she was planning on abstaining. Sarah Smothers of Huntsville said that while she loves a good romp in the hay, standing in solidarity with the women of Alabama is more important. She did say that she was willing to compromise by allowing her boyfriend access to her exit hole, but she later recanted when she found out sodomy is also illegal in Alabama.